New Year's Eve

Why hello there! Long time no see. It has been nearly 3 weeks since my last movie review was posted and feels like even longer than that since I've been in the theaters. A holiday weekend, a business trip, and lack of anything good in the theaters will do that to a guy. But fear not, a new computer at home to post reviews, and new refillable diet soda and popcorn containers and we are back!

Despite our better judgement my bride and I ventured out to see New Year's Eve, the latest mega cast, no story movie from director Garry Marshall of Valentine's Day fame. A word to the wise: if he directs a movie about Flag Day, just go ahead and skip it.

I normally like to discuss the plot lines of the movie I saw in this paragraph. If only this movie had one, I would. The list of stars is endless, but unfortunately when you have that many people in the movie you need a storyline for each actor, and since this movie wasn't 17 hours long (it only felt like it), that means you get a lot of jumping around and just plain confusion.

In no particular order you have a rock star trying to revive a romance with a chef, a police officer helping the VP of the Times Square Alliance with the New Years Eve ball drop, a dying cancer patient hoping to reunite with a loved one, a protective single mother having issues with her daughter going out with friends, two couple battling to have the first baby of the new year, two neighbors getting stuck in an elevator and consequently falling in love, a bike messenger helping a lady twice his age achieve her new year's resolutions, a nurse who misses her husband who is overseas fighting in the war, and finally a record company executive hoping to find the women of his dreams that he met last new year's eve.

That's nine different story lines, and officially the longest sentence in the history of this blog.

This movie is exactly what the trailer makes it out to be, a star studded, feel good movie, that will probably make a ton of cash. The list of actors is impressive, the music keeps you tapping your toes (just the fact that Jon Bon Jovi both acts and signs earned this movie an extra rating point), and the story has you wishing you were somewhere else.

I have a few bones to pick with those who made this movie:

#1- You were obviously using stock footage taken from New Year's Eve 2011. There were PLENTY of visible 2011 hats, and glasses early on in the show, At one point the year at the bottom of the ball drop says 2011. Even though we paid to see this movie, we are not that stupid.

#2- You had so many big names in this movie that you had people like Alyssa Milano, Penny Marshall, James Belushi, and Amare Stoudemire basically as extras. In the case of the latter, he doesn't even appear until the credits are rolling. Maybe we should have saved the money spent on these folks salaries to hire another writer, you know one with talent.

This movie is going to benefit from the fact that is has a niche time of year, and a niche market.

Congratulations America, you will be watching this on HBO for year's to come.

New Year's Eve
Directed by: Garry Marshall
Written by: Katherine Fugate
Starring: Sarah Jessica Parker, Jessica Biel, and Ashton Kutcher
My Rating: 1.5 out of 5
Would Gene Pick it?: No

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